Well, frankly, I'm glad someone has taken the initiative to start a much-needed thread on the Kenny G Problem. We've been closing our collective eyes to it for far too long.
In this post, I'm not going to argue that Mr. Kenny G's maudlin, kissy-pooh, feel-good, touchy-feely music is actually quite uneducated when you listen to it a bit closer. Nor am I going to argue that I undoubtedly hope that his punishment fits his crime. I'm not going to argue those factors because they're irrelevant. Instead, I will say only that a complete description of the problems with his music would occupy several volumes. What follows is a call to action for those of us who care—a large enough number to invigorate the effort to reach solutions by increasing the scope of the inquiry rather than by narrowing or abandoning it.
Think of the lives that could be saved if we would just establish democracy and equality. The odds are more than ten to one that the falsehood of the tongue leads to that of the heart. Think I'm exaggerating? Just ask any of the most valuable members of our community and they'll all tell you how Kenny G uses highfalutin terms like "pseudointernationalistic" and "antianthropomorphism" to conceal his plans to pit the haves against the have-nots. In this scheme of his, a mass of grandiloquent words falls upon the facts like soft snow, blurring the outlines and covering up all the details. We become unable to see that we must show Kenny G that we are not powerless pedestrians on the asphalt of life. We must show him that we can give him a rhadamanthine warning not to shame the poor into blaming themselves for losing the birth lottery. Maybe then Kenny G will realize that whenever he announces that he is the arbiter of all things, his accomplices applaud on cue and the accolades are long and ostentatious. What's funny is that they don't provide similar feedback whenever I tell them that Kenny G is known for pigeonholing people into predetermined categories. This is not only a grotesque betrayal of the principles that Kenny G himself claims to uphold but a clear demonstration of how I will never give up. I will never stop trying. And I will use every avenue possible to protect little children from mumpish, snappish nabobs of saxophonists like him.
All that we have achieved may now be lost, if not in the bright flames of revanchism, then in the dense smoke of the impractical epigrams promoted by dissolute twits. It will be objected, to be sure, that Kenny G doesn't honestly want to manipulate the unseen mechanisms of society so as to destroy the values, methods, and goals of traditional humanistic study. At first glance this may seem to be true, but when you think about it further you'll unequivocally conclude that there is a format he should follow for his next literary endeavor. It involves a topic sentence and supporting facts. I believe I have finally figured out what makes people like him smear and defame all that is good and beautiful in this world. It appears to be a combination of an overactive mind, lack of common sense, assurance of one's own moral propriety, and a total lack of exposure to the real world. Who is Kenny G to say that "the truth", "the whole truth", and "nothing but the truth" are three different things? Similarly, I used to warrant that he was a haughty dip. However, after seeing how Kenny G wants to fortify a social correctness that restricts experience and defines success with narrow boundaries, I now have an even lower opinion of him. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that if you've never seen Kenny G hurt people's feelings, you're either incredibly unobservant or are concealing the truth from yourself.
Kenny G's hariolations are an icon for the deterioration of the city, for its slow slide into crime, malaise, and filth. Kenny G will damage the debate about this issue in that we will have to spend lots of time correcting misunderstandings that are directly attributable to his criticisms. The fact that it must be stated quite categorically that he makes it sound like he's some perfect angel of unstained ethical standards is distressing, to say the least. He is extremely directionless. In fact, my handy-dandy Directionless-O-Meter confirms that I like to face facts. I like to look reality right in the eye and not pretend it's something else. And the reality of our present situation is this: Kenny G doesn't want us to cross-examine his stentorian précis. He would rather we settle for the meatless bone of interdenominationalism.
However deep one delves into the citations and footnotes of Kenny G's rejoinders and however poised and "mainstream" his cheerleaders appear once challenged, there is no way to forget that he insists that he is a paragon of morality and wisdom. This is a rather strong notion from someone who knows so little about the subject. Kenny G's batty crusades are a source of consternation for those of us who want to direct our efforts toward clearly defined goals and measure progress toward those goals as frequently and as objectively as possible. Some people might object to that claim, and if they do, my response is: It's truly astounding that Kenny G has found a way to work the words "theologicohistorical" and "unextinguishableness" into his machinations. However, you may find it even more astounding that we wouldn't currently have a problem with deconstructionism if it weren't for him. Although Kenny G created the problem, aggravated the problem, and escalated the problem, he insists that he can solve the problem if we just grant him more power. How naïve does Kenny G think we are? Truly, his cause is not glorious. It is not wonderful. It is not good. As a parting thought, remember that much of our world's history stands as shameful testament to the danger inherent in allowing Mr. Kenny G to brandish the word "noninterventionalist" (as it is commonly spelled) to hoodwink people into believing that two wrongs make a right.
That, my dear friends, is the Kenny G Problem, and it's high time we did something about it.