[Chris Peryagh]

No more expensive or heavy dent tools to use and maintain or store!

Using the power of your mind you too can remove dents - even in the most awkward spots!

Telekinetic dent removal is a completely non-contact and the safest way of removing the most stubborn and largest of dents without leaving any scratches, bulges, causing any plating or lacquer damage or removing soft soldered parts - in fact, the whole dent can be removed without having to take a single key off!

Now, wouldn't that be a true gift?

If only...

 

[Honker]

A better idea is to create a psychic force field around the instrument so that it doesn't get damaged in the first place.

 

[Reedsplinter]

No more expensive or heavy dent tools to use and maintain or store!

Using the power of your mind you too can remove dents - even in the most awkward spots!

Telekinetic dent removal is a completely non-contact and the safest way of removing the most stubborn and largest of dents without leaving any scratches, bulges, causing any plating or lacquer damage or removing soft soldered parts - in fact, the whole dent can be removed without having to take a single key off!

Now, wouldn't that be a true gift?

If only...

It's a small step from spoon bending to key bending. . . .

 

[Chris Peryagh]

Exactly!

Same way it's a small step from making brass bowls and trinkets for tourists visiting India to making simple system saxes to hang on the wall! Well, you don't expect to be able to play a sax you bought for under £40 in a market?

 

[Reedsplinter]

Exactly!

Same way it's a small step from making brass bowls and trinkets for tourists visiting India to making simple system saxes to hang on the wall! Well, you don't expect to be able to play a sax you bought for under £40?

I don't?:shock: I mean. . .no. . .well. . .of course not?!

 

[Chris Peryagh]

I wonder why Uri Geller hasn't gone into dent removal?

 

[Reedsplinter]

I wonder why Uri Geller hasn't gone into dent removal?

Hadn't you heard? He's doing body work for Emilio now. Think about it: when's the last time you saw him on Carson?

 

[Chris Peryagh]

What? Frank Carson of 'It's the way you tell 'em' fame?

I think it's yet another product of an over-active imagnation (and the fact it's way past my bedtime) - here's where it stemmed from: http://test.woodwind.org/clarinet/BBoard/read.html?f=1&i=253360&t=253360

 

[Chris Peryagh]

But who would you trust to do telekinetic dent removal - Uri Geller or Carrie White?

 

[Reedsplinter]

But who would you trust to do telekinetic dent removal - Uri Geller or Carrie White?

Jesus. He doesn't even have to use his mind to do it! And he won't cross you.

 

[Chris Peryagh]

Don't worry - I do put my mind to useful things sometimes, such as designing various keywork mechanisms and automatic 8ve mechanisms, though that doesn't mean I don't have part of my brain devoted to idle or useless stuff - probably the larger percentage!

Uh-oh - the men in white coats just have arrived!

 

[Reedsplinter]

No no. I meant I would trust JESUS to do telekinetic repairs. I see I was a tad ambiguous. "Jesus" was not an oath, it was a repair guy's name!

 

[Chris Peryagh]

Was Jesus telekinetic? I know he could do the loaves and fishes thing and walk on water (and turn water into wine) but could he tackle a droped bari sax and make it as good as new?

He'd be the oldest sax tech in the business if he could!

 

[Reedsplinter]

Was Jesus telekinetic? I know he could do the loaves and fishes thing and walk on water (and turn water into wine) but could he tackle a droped bari sax and make it as good as new?

He'd be the oldest sax tech in the business if he could!

In the Apocryphal book of Judas, Jesus repairs Herod's contrabass sax, prompting Herod's famous saying, "I find no fault in this horn." It is sometimes mistranslated, the Latin word for "man" coming from a root-word (ha!) meaning "damned big horn." Not to be confused, ever, with "Little Big Horn."

 

[hakukani]

Not to be confused, ever, with "Little Big Horn."

No, "Little Big Horn" would be a massacre, not a martyr.

 

[Reedsplinter]

No, "Little Big Horn" would be a massacre, not a martyr.

But if you put 5000 martyrs all in one place, you have a massacre, don't you?

 

[Chris Peryagh]

Looks like attending a Roman Catholic school was wasted on me from the religious point of view - in one ear and out the other. Sister Maria Goretti, Sister Scolastica and Cannon Fogarty won't be pleased.

Neither will my gran.

But I do have a skill that is of much more use to me than religion, and the fumes of Evo-Stik are much more tollerable than the smell of burning insence.

The power of Yamaha compells me!

 

[abadcliche]

I heard he always has a 3-day wait, though.

 

[Reedsplinter]

I heard he always has a 3-day wait, though.

But he always had 100% of his original lacquer.

 

[jbtsax]

SOTW must be getting hard up for repair and maintenance topics.