I like the idea in this and for whatever reason it has a South African vibe about it. There has obviously been a lot of work in putting this together. Kudos for sticking with it and hopefully you've accomplished what you've set out to do. From a very personal point of view (as just one listener), I prefer hearing things a little simpler and more direct. The more that's put in the muddier things can get. Those stacked harmonies are very hard to do and because the timbre of the instruments is the same, can exaggerate any very slight problems with intonation. In other words you've created a situation where you've made the intonation sound off, when it's not really that bad.
You had several excellent breaks that broke the piece up and were simpler. Those worked very well. Also the solo parts also worked well. If you thought about putting more time into this I'd love to hear a version where you stripped this down to its basic elements and used the sax chorus only occasionally as an accent.
Concept, playing and breaks (giving contrast) all excellent.
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