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Discussion Starter #1
I was at the park fly-fishing at ten til eight and the phone rang and a guy named Tommy I didn't know asked if I could play a date at the Jumpin Jupiter in Maplewood at nine. I said yea I'll be there. Turns out its a burlesque show with the whole deal.

I was sitting in the dressing room waiting to hit when one of the dancers said, "why do you look so sad?", and I said, "I'm getting divorced and I haven't even been able to talk to my four year old Ella or my two year old Beatrice on the phone in a month." "The last time I tried to see them my father in law pushed me out of Ella's arms on to the ground and then called the police and told them I assaulted him"

Also you play the whole form on Rhythm Changes at a burlesque show including the last two bars.
 

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Dude i feel for you and been there once myself. don't worry you will see your kids and good luck okay.
 

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that must have sucked! love will not be denied. love does keep us alive.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
Things are turning around. Phone bills and bank statements don't lie.

New quartet www.christopherbraig.com

Getting back to where things before she ultimatumed me into a teaching career.
 

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OK saw the girls together for the first time in 55 days. Moved into a very cool apartment hope to have the girls overnight Monday and Tuesday and every other Sunday. Making it playing and teaching just keeping my head above water. Been off the scene five years so the who the heck is this guy thing is in my favor. Webster U faculty very helpful.

I played a lot of soprano in the day and I'm hitting it hard. Nobody really doing it here and lots of flute same deal. People really like the flute and tease me about the movie. Which I'm using to get over. "Baby makin music." Course I'm trying to channel Dolphy.

New quartet with top St. Louis players. Video: www.christopherbraig.com

Once the custody thing is settled look out brother!!!!!!
 

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Christopher -- This is good news!
 

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I watched your video Chris and it took me back. Ever since those times I have tried very hard to be a good Dad and not speak Ill of my ex or her parents. History will make it's own judgements, more importantly, so will my kids - who I now have a great relationship with because I remained in their lives despite the efforts of others.

Keep up the good fight, dont let the black dog catch you and be a great Dad

I've since helped two friends in similar situations who had nothing.

Karma wins.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
Thanks man, Aussies seem to get me, would really like to see some of it, I know its a continent.

What you do counts, Karma always wins, I ain't worried on this account.
 

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You should take that video down immediately. Do it now before custody proceeding starts.

I say this as a I know a very close mom who went through a very nasty separation/custody. The Dad did a similar thing on a web site, similar to what you did in your video. He said a lot of not nice things about his in-laws too. The web site was printed out and taken to a hearing to establish his mental imbalance, unfitness to parent, and other things. He lost custody for 6 months as a result and got supervised visitation for the entire time. (there were other factors that counted against him too, but having a deranged web site ranting at his in-laws and wife certainly didn't help.)

Think about it. Six months. that's a lot longer than 55 days.

Save all these accusations and innuendo for the court, where you'll actually need it most. Bring plenty of documentation.

I know you're angry and hurt but you need to work smarter, not harder right now. It feels so good to vent, but it's going to totally work against you.
 

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oh yeah and one more thing: that woman I was talking about, she and the husband reconciled. They're still together.

The web site came down long before that.

Go figure.
 

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You should take that video down immediately. Do it now before custody proceeding starts.

I say this as a I know a very close mom who went through a very nasty separation/custody. The Dad did a similar thing on a web site, similar to what you did in your video. He said a lot of not nice things about his in-laws too. The web site was printed out and taken to a hearing to establish his mental imbalance, unfitness to parent, and other things. He lost custody for 6 months as a result and got supervised visitation for the entire time. (there were other factors that counted against him too, but having a deranged web site ranting at his in-laws and wife certainly didn't help.)

Think about it. Six months. that's a lot longer than 55 days.

Save all these accusations and innuendo for the court, where you'll actually need it most. Bring plenty of documentation.

I know you're angry and hurt but you need to work smarter, not harder right now. It feels so good to vent, but it's going to totally work against you.

Great advice here Chris, listen to it.

And fwiw I've been through what you're going through, you think the pain will never end, but it does. Trust me.
 

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Very, very definitely.. take it down. It will turn around and bite you in the arse.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
OK down.

Here's the deal I was homeless for a month, lost my kids, cancled credit card, she took every cent.........

Everything in that video I can prove in their own words bank statements etc.

Why on Earth would we have a system where someone who has been victimized in every way can't tell whomever they want about it?

What the f is going on here? Not one person from the court has given her permission to do any of this.
 

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Why on Earth would we have a system where someone who has been victimized in every way can't tell whomever they want about it?

What the f is going on here? Not one person from the court has given her permission to do any of this.

It's because our legal system is based on form and procedures, not truth and honesty. Opposing attorneys look for violations of prededent regardless of truth.
 

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It's not a matter of ideals, it's a matter of reality. If she has indeed done those things, then it's in YOUR interest to be as smart about this as you need to be. First and most obvious thing; hope you have a good lawyer.
 

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Discussion Starter #17
Hi everyone!

I have been spending time with the girls alone. At some point I think a book or something is going to happen. It has been unreal what I've been through.

Bottom line is I've been vindicated and discovered some things about the world any myself along the way.

“My actions are my only true belongings.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh, Understanding Our Mind: 50 Verses on Buddhist Psychology

Now back to our program!
 

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Hi everyone!

I have been spending time with the girls alone. At some point I think a book or something is going to happen. It has been unreal what I've been through.

Bottom line is I've been vindicated and discovered some things about the world any myself along the way.

“My actions are my only true belongings.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh, Understanding Our Mind: 50 Verses on Buddhist Psychology

Now back to our program!
I'm a better Dad because of what happend to me, sounds like you will be too. In the long run, when you look back in 10 years that will be what matters most.
 

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I didn't get to see the video but it sounds like you got good advice and heeded it. Look, I've been in the very same situation. And it even happened in St. Louis. I lived 2 blocks from Webster U. My kids went to Webster College School. They're all grown now and I have 5 grandchildren. But back then ... it was Hell. The sweet part is I have a good relationship with both my adult children and have had for many years, while their relationship with their mother is strained. I never spoke ill of her to the kids, even though she wouldn't allow me to see them until I got an agreement through the court. She accused me of all manner of awful things. But I held on and waited patiently. Karma does win out. Your kids will know the real you. And as they grow up, they will become closer to those who truly have their best interests at heart. Hang in there, and know that things will get better and the pain will lessen. Eventually it will be like a hard scab over an old wound and you just won't go there anymore.
 

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I've produced a couple videos about this, and the consensus is what MM mentioned, don't speak ill of the other parent in front of the kids, and it's not an easy thing to do, but you have to remember they identify with that parent as well, and they take any criticism of that parent as a criticism of themselves as well. Just focus on your relationship with the children. and re-read MM's last post, it has some great advice.
 
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