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I couldn't find a comedy sub-forum, so I'm posting this here. Thought it was absolutely hilarious.

[The most important thing about Cannonball® is the acoustical customizing we do to every horn. Yes our horns are beautiful, yes our horns are well made, but we also want them to play great. That's why we have specially trained and talented acoustical adjusters to work on each of our horns.

The Cannonball® acoustical adjusters are trained extensively to be able to create the best sounding instruments. All of our saxophones are worked on until each horn has fluent altissimo, rich lows, even timbre, full-bodied sound, and in-line overtones. Every trumpet is prepared to slot well and play with clarity and full, acoustic resonance. Each clarinet hand-finished for intonation, full throat tones, warmth, vibrancy and projection. And all flutes are individually adjusted for a responsive lip plate with optimal air flow and a full, rich, and resonant sound.

Our goal is for you to feel the same exhilaration as we do when you play. We want you to say, "I can't put this horn down!"]
 

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Just a guy who plays saxophone.
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Why do you need a comedy sub forum for this? Have you ever played a Cannonball? Did you come here 15 years late to make fun of them, because since the stone series saxes came out nobody really has much bad to say about them that knows anything about saxophones. They come out of Utah and are sent out to the shops in their network with a high quality set up that most other companies just don’t offer. What’s your beef?
 

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Cannonball Vintage Reborn Tenor Sax with Cannonball 5J hr (Meyer clone produced by JJ Babbitt))
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I like my Vintage Reborn Tenor. What have I owned in the past? Conn 10M tenor, Vito Alto (made by Yamaha), Beuscher 400 Tenor, Couf Superba II Tenor. My Cannonball stands up to them just fine. I did not listen to the stones when I selected it, but I did try a Yamaha YTS 62 III, a Selmer STS711, and a P. Muriat whose model number I do not recall. The Cannonball out played those horns. Ah, it's because I am an armature who has only been playing for 50 years.
 

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When I was in high school, I came really close to buying a Cannonball alto. They have a huge sound and some of them are really quite striking, though I think they're too often tacky looking. They're good horns, but we don't have to defend the company from mild ribbing. Brands aren't your friends, and it's always good to dunk on hyperbolic ad copy.
 

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Cannonball Vintage Reborn Tenor Sax with Cannonball 5J hr (Meyer clone produced by JJ Babbitt))
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I admit that I never heard anything about the stones or acoustic adjustments until after I purchased my horn. I like the looks, even though I was not looking for that. Late in 2020, I became interested in finding out when my horn had actually been produced (it was 2019) I called Cannonball and Sheryl Laukat, the CEO, actually answered the phone. We had a lovely chat. Her people were out, but she was answering outside lines.
 

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The store I where I worked in the early 2000’s passed on carrying the Cannonball line; I seem to remember the head of cannonball rubbed the management of the store the wrong way . I tried a vintage tenor a while back, thought it was pretty nice. I think they’ve done well marketing to students for step up horns, and while I’m not a fan of the different pearls/stones/finishes it does have an appeal to some and likely gets kids into playing their horn if it looks cool. 🤪
 

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The CB I've tried have all been pretty nice and seem to be a good value when it comes to saxophones. They have nice cases. They come with two necks. The sound and keywork is to my liking. The stones are pretty and something that sets them apart from most other horns in that price range. That's all.
I haven't heard, felt or imagined a greater sound to them because of stones or "highly trained acoustical pros" work. Just claiming that they make good horns would be much better than claiming wizard enhancements.
If they are that good, the users will come up with whacky claims about how the stones and such make so much of a difference.
Marketing is an incredible rabbit hole in which many companies loose themselves.
 

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I live about 40 minutes from the Cannonball headquarters and I am good friends with Ryan Lillywhite, one of their acoustic "customizers". One time on a visit to pick up some replacement pivot screws and felts for my shop, I asked Ryan about what they do to "acoustically customize" each professional model saxophone before it is sent to the dealer. He said he couldn't share with me the exact process because it was "proprietary", but that he could do a demonstration. For those who haven't heard him play tenor on the Cannonball videos, he is a very accomplished player as are the other saxophone "acoustic customizers" at Cannonball.

He then selected a tenor randomly from those waiting to be "customized". After a short warm up, he played about 5 minutes of improvisation including altissimo at full volume. It sounded great to my ears. He then had me leave the room while he did his "thing" which I know generally involves making some changes inside the neck. He called me back in and played the tenor again. It was unmistakably a bigger and more brilliant sound than before---a much greater change than I had expected. He then proceeded to demonstrate the same process on a professional model alto, and the change in the sound was just as unmistakable as on the tenor. I asked where he learned to do those "adjustments" and he said that Tevis had learned a lot about acoustic adjustments from someone on the west coast, and it took him months to perfect the technique on the scores of necks they could get from the Cannonball factory. He then passed that knowledge on to both Ryan Lillywhite who customizes tenors and baris and Randal Clark who does altos and sopranos.
 
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